those three dots represent how I'm feeling right now.
...
telling me that tomorrow is another unknown day,
that the future may be bleak or bright depending on how you look at it,
that some things are never for long,
the things you want, ending too soon and the things you dread, never seem to end,
that things continue on even without you,
that it is a nice feeling anticpating something,
but also quite frustrating when the waiting is too long,
that there is hope,
that even though tomorrow seems too scary,
the better and only choice is always to move on.
*more days are coming to an end. still more days are coming...
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Friday, January 02, 2009
Extreme ends
Crying from the pain of aspiring something,
and crying from having nothing to aspire;
i wonder which is more difficult.
-Takemoto-kun, Honey and Clover Jdrama
*I'm at a crossroads and this line reminded me of my fears and inhibitions...Hay...
and crying from having nothing to aspire;
i wonder which is more difficult.
-Takemoto-kun, Honey and Clover Jdrama
*I'm at a crossroads and this line reminded me of my fears and inhibitions...Hay...
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Welcome 2009!!!
It's almost the end of yet another year. How time flies. Oh, how it flies.
Still left with the many resolutions made, it is time again to create new ones... The year ahead promises many new things, doors to be unlocked, adventures to take, experiences to unravel, strangers to meet, awaiting and dreading at the same time.
2008: Many last things. Many last things. Many last things. I'll miss it. For sure. But...
2009: Promises even more. Looking forward to a lot of new beginnings.
Happy New Year!!! With a shed of sadness, shadowed with a ton of cheers! =)
Still left with the many resolutions made, it is time again to create new ones... The year ahead promises many new things, doors to be unlocked, adventures to take, experiences to unravel, strangers to meet, awaiting and dreading at the same time.
2008: Many last things. Many last things. Many last things. I'll miss it. For sure. But...
2009: Promises even more. Looking forward to a lot of new beginnings.
Happy New Year!!! With a shed of sadness, shadowed with a ton of cheers! =)
Sunday, December 07, 2008
After Retreat
...is total haggardness. After being able to recharge, seems like God scheduled the retreat so that we'll have the energy to face the many many tasks ahead. I can't even see the morrow without a task waiting to be hurdled. But it's better than being idle. It's just that I somehow feel I'm gonna get sick any moment now. I'm gonna have to get used to being busy with tasks again. Lol.
...are many realizations here and there. Sole purpose in life is to be able to give the love God gave us back to Him. Have to keep that in mind always.
*God is good. All the time. God is where? Everywhere.* =)
...are many realizations here and there. Sole purpose in life is to be able to give the love God gave us back to Him. Have to keep that in mind always.
*God is good. All the time. God is where? Everywhere.* =)
Friday, November 28, 2008
[Mini-corner]
Silently screaming
in the dead of the night.
Waiting and waiting
for the outstretched hand.
Stooped to cringing
in the corner of the world.
In my mini-corner,
I wonder.
I hope.
I hope...
in the dead of the night.
Waiting and waiting
for the outstretched hand.
Stooped to cringing
in the corner of the world.
In my mini-corner,
I wonder.
I hope.
I hope...
Behind the Mystery...
Ten Top Trivia Tips about Frustratedangel!
- Frustratedangel has three eyelids!
- Donald Duck's middle name is frustratedangel!
- You should always open frustratedangel at least an hour before drinking her.
- The only Englishman to become frustratedangel was Nicholas Breakspear, who was frustratedangel from 1154 to 1159.
- Without its lining of frustratedangel, your stomach would digest itself.
- Until the 1960s, frustratedangel was not allowed to enter Disneyland.
- Frustratedangel will become gaseous if her temperature rises above -42°C!
- The Eskimos have over fifty words for frustratedangel!
- Baskin Robbins once made frustratedangel flavoured ice cream.
- All shrimp are born as frustratedangel, but gradually mature into females!
*Got this from mia again! Nakaka-aliw...hehe...=)
Monday, November 24, 2008
My Colorgenics Profile
You are seeking an affectionate relationship, offering fulfilment and happiness. You are capable of powerful emotional enthusiasm. Deep down, you are a kind loving person, always helpful and willing to adapt yourself if necessary to realise the bond of affection that you desire. But you need the same consideration and understanding from others and it is this need that will sometimes hold you back... so let go, trust and you may pleasantly surprised at what happens.
The way things are you are under considerable stress and you feel that there is little hope of matters righting themselves. Everyone about you seems to aggravate the problem even more. You feel that at this time you need to be alone and you are right - move back and give yourself a chance to breathe.
Nothing seems to be going right for you and you are thwarted every way you turn. You are not at all happy with the situation but it would appear that there is very little that you can do about it at this time. Sit back and let the situation take its course, because at this time you feel that there is nothing you can do to change whatever needs to be changed.
Whatever has caused the situation, you just don't seem to be able to sustain or maintain relationships as you would wish to. What you really seek is to be able to develop a relationship with someone with whom you can truly share: Love, Serenity, Peace and Quiet. But you are a very demanding person and it is your nature that leads to disquiet and discord: you are like the tide, flotsam and jetsam... One minute you experience 'highs' and a few moments later 'lows'. This obviously will introduce discord into any relationship and with this demanding attitude - the ideal state you desire is unable to develop. Despite the urge to gratify your natural desires, you impose a considerable self-restraint on your instincts in the belief that this demonstrates your superiority and raises you above the common herd. You are extremely critical of everything that is presently going on around you and you find it difficult to listen to or to take advice from anyone. You enjoy the original, the ingenious and the subtle.
You would like to be respected and valued for yourself and this can only be achieved from within a close and harmonious relationship.
The way things are you are under considerable stress and you feel that there is little hope of matters righting themselves. Everyone about you seems to aggravate the problem even more. You feel that at this time you need to be alone and you are right - move back and give yourself a chance to breathe.
Nothing seems to be going right for you and you are thwarted every way you turn. You are not at all happy with the situation but it would appear that there is very little that you can do about it at this time. Sit back and let the situation take its course, because at this time you feel that there is nothing you can do to change whatever needs to be changed.
Whatever has caused the situation, you just don't seem to be able to sustain or maintain relationships as you would wish to. What you really seek is to be able to develop a relationship with someone with whom you can truly share: Love, Serenity, Peace and Quiet. But you are a very demanding person and it is your nature that leads to disquiet and discord: you are like the tide, flotsam and jetsam... One minute you experience 'highs' and a few moments later 'lows'. This obviously will introduce discord into any relationship and with this demanding attitude - the ideal state you desire is unable to develop. Despite the urge to gratify your natural desires, you impose a considerable self-restraint on your instincts in the belief that this demonstrates your superiority and raises you above the common herd. You are extremely critical of everything that is presently going on around you and you find it difficult to listen to or to take advice from anyone. You enjoy the original, the ingenious and the subtle.
You would like to be respected and valued for yourself and this can only be achieved from within a close and harmonious relationship.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Ponder a Moment, Decide and Stick to It.
Make time for the things you really want.
If you don't, expect that nothing will happen.
Prioritize so that you won't get lost and you'll always know where you are going.
*Advices I have been getting lately from people who care. Thanks!
If you don't, expect that nothing will happen.
Prioritize so that you won't get lost and you'll always know where you are going.
*Advices I have been getting lately from people who care. Thanks!
Friday, November 07, 2008
the beauty in loneliness
It's ironic, how most of the time the very thing that causes us pain is the very thing we keep longing for.
I wonder why most people enjoy watching dramas that make them end up crying with puffy eyes, why most people are attracted to sad love songs that let them relive the painful memories of the past, why most people wallow in their pain, in their sorrow and chooses to be so until they can no longer hold themselves together...
What is there in pain? What is there in loneliness?
I wonder if the very essence of pain is to let us appreciate happiness more. If by being lonely we realize that we are not alone after all. If having our visions blurred by tears, we see more clearly the very things we have overlooked many many times.
I wonder and I'll keep wondering the beauty and the comfort loneliness brings. To me. And maybe to a thousand other people.
So for now, I'll still keep searching for good dramas that will keep the tears flowing, I'll keep listening to sad love songs that stir my heart a couple too many times, I'll keep seeking for pain, for sorrow...
And I'll keep smiling through the tears...
I wonder why most people enjoy watching dramas that make them end up crying with puffy eyes, why most people are attracted to sad love songs that let them relive the painful memories of the past, why most people wallow in their pain, in their sorrow and chooses to be so until they can no longer hold themselves together...
What is there in pain? What is there in loneliness?
I wonder if the very essence of pain is to let us appreciate happiness more. If by being lonely we realize that we are not alone after all. If having our visions blurred by tears, we see more clearly the very things we have overlooked many many times.
I wonder and I'll keep wondering the beauty and the comfort loneliness brings. To me. And maybe to a thousand other people.
So for now, I'll still keep searching for good dramas that will keep the tears flowing, I'll keep listening to sad love songs that stir my heart a couple too many times, I'll keep seeking for pain, for sorrow...
And I'll keep smiling through the tears...
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
10 things I want to say to 10 people
*taken from mia*
Write 10 things that you wanna say to 10 people. Anything you wanna tell them. Basta the rule is, DON'T STATE THEIR NAME.
1. I'm sorry, I have failed you in many different ways. I want to do all these things for you, help me and guide me always. Remind me always that You are the sole reason for my existence.
2. I'll keep trying, no matter how hard, I'll still try. Because I do not like hurting you, because I truly care.
3. It's been really hard accepting everything. I didn't realize that I've been having a hard time forgiving. I hope that I'll slowly have a change of heart. I truly hope that time can heal wounds.
4. I admire you in more ways than you can ever imagine. You have a pure heart and most of the time I wish I had that too.
5. I'm scared for you. I wish that I could shape the world so that you won't get hurt and that you'll understand things better. Just remember, we're always here for you. Always.
6. I wonder what you really think of me. I keep getting deceived by your gentle ways. I hope we could be friends. At least kahit friends lang.
7. I miss you. I've not been such a good friend lately. Missing in action. I know you understand but still I hope I can make it up to you. *hug*
8. I haven't heard from you in a long while. The next time we see each other, hope nothing changes.
9. Thank you. Sometimes, I don't understand your ways, but I'm glad we are what we are. It gets complicated in between, but I'm glad our bond is strong, and I'll want it to keep getting stronger.
10. You never fail to brighten up people's day. I see your struggles but that only makes you all the more admirable. You just don't see it, but your more lovable than you think you are. *hug*
Write 10 things that you wanna say to 10 people. Anything you wanna tell them. Basta the rule is, DON'T STATE THEIR NAME.
1. I'm sorry, I have failed you in many different ways. I want to do all these things for you, help me and guide me always. Remind me always that You are the sole reason for my existence.
2. I'll keep trying, no matter how hard, I'll still try. Because I do not like hurting you, because I truly care.
3. It's been really hard accepting everything. I didn't realize that I've been having a hard time forgiving. I hope that I'll slowly have a change of heart. I truly hope that time can heal wounds.
4. I admire you in more ways than you can ever imagine. You have a pure heart and most of the time I wish I had that too.
5. I'm scared for you. I wish that I could shape the world so that you won't get hurt and that you'll understand things better. Just remember, we're always here for you. Always.
6. I wonder what you really think of me. I keep getting deceived by your gentle ways. I hope we could be friends. At least kahit friends lang.
7. I miss you. I've not been such a good friend lately. Missing in action. I know you understand but still I hope I can make it up to you. *hug*
8. I haven't heard from you in a long while. The next time we see each other, hope nothing changes.
9. Thank you. Sometimes, I don't understand your ways, but I'm glad we are what we are. It gets complicated in between, but I'm glad our bond is strong, and I'll want it to keep getting stronger.
10. You never fail to brighten up people's day. I see your struggles but that only makes you all the more admirable. You just don't see it, but your more lovable than you think you are. *hug*
Last sembreak
Time is ticking near. Every second, every minute, gone for good.
My college life is nearing its end, hopefully, should be. My last semestral break, the looming last semester till graduadtion.
Too many things to accomplish still. Too many memories to hold. Too many decisons left unmade.
*I'm in my drama mode. Forgive me for the mushiness.
My college life is nearing its end, hopefully, should be. My last semestral break, the looming last semester till graduadtion.
Too many things to accomplish still. Too many memories to hold. Too many decisons left unmade.
*I'm in my drama mode. Forgive me for the mushiness.
Sunday, October 12, 2008
I was so happy when you smiled
Your smile breaks through the clouds of grey
Far from the sunny days that lie in sleep
Waiting with patience for the spring
When the flowers will bloom renewed again
Knowing there's more beyond the pain of today
Although the scars of yesterday remain
You can keep on living as much as your heart believes
You can't be born again
All though you can change
Let's stay together always
Smile only at me and touch me with those fingers
This simple desire is everlasting
I want things to be simple
Let's finally get across this sea of mournful sorrow
For instance, even if today is painful
Someday it will become a warm memory
If you leave everything up to your heart
I understand the meaning our living here
It is to know the joy of having been born
Let's stay together always
For instance, even if today is painful
Someday it will become a warm memory
If you leave everything up to your heart
I understand the meaning our living here
It is to know the joy of having been born
Let's stay together always
*Finished reading Fruits Basket manga...sense of accomplishment...happy ending even though they were all somewhat broken throughout the series. By the way, the lyrics above are from the anime...it leaves a feeling of hope, doesn't it?
Your smile breaks through the clouds of grey
Far from the sunny days that lie in sleep
Waiting with patience for the spring
When the flowers will bloom renewed again
Knowing there's more beyond the pain of today
Although the scars of yesterday remain
You can keep on living as much as your heart believes
You can't be born again
All though you can change
Let's stay together always
Smile only at me and touch me with those fingers
This simple desire is everlasting
I want things to be simple
Let's finally get across this sea of mournful sorrow
For instance, even if today is painful
Someday it will become a warm memory
If you leave everything up to your heart
I understand the meaning our living here
It is to know the joy of having been born
Let's stay together always
For instance, even if today is painful
Someday it will become a warm memory
If you leave everything up to your heart
I understand the meaning our living here
It is to know the joy of having been born
Let's stay together always
*Finished reading Fruits Basket manga...sense of accomplishment...happy ending even though they were all somewhat broken throughout the series. By the way, the lyrics above are from the anime...it leaves a feeling of hope, doesn't it?
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
habang nakikipagdaldalan...
kanina sa last class namin with my seatmate. She commented: "Ay, gemini ka talaga!" And so, she enumerates some of the characteristics most gemini's have:
-Conversationalist/ Chatty person
-Shaky when it comes to beliefs and decisions
-Judgmental
-Gullible/ Easily persuaded
-Sensitive
-Crybaby/Emotional
-Witty
-Moody
Surprisingly, most of it hit the spot. Well, it's not that I believe in such things... it just got me thinking about my personality and some of my general traits.
*It's funny how two persons can be so alike and different at the same time.
Ay, oo alam ko pasaway makipagdaldalan habang nagkaklase, patapos na naman eh. Hehe.
-Conversationalist/ Chatty person
-Shaky when it comes to beliefs and decisions
-Judgmental
-Gullible/ Easily persuaded
-Sensitive
-Crybaby/Emotional
-Witty
-Moody
Surprisingly, most of it hit the spot. Well, it's not that I believe in such things... it just got me thinking about my personality and some of my general traits.
*It's funny how two persons can be so alike and different at the same time.
Ay, oo alam ko pasaway makipagdaldalan habang nagkaklase, patapos na naman eh. Hehe.
Monday, July 28, 2008
true?!
Your Birthdate: June 2 |
 You're so intuitive, it's like you have a sixth, seventh, and eighth sense. You connect with others freely and easily - and you tend to have many best friends. Warm and caring, it's hard for you to close your heart to anyone. Affection is like air for you - you need to give and receive it to survive. Your strength: Your universal compassion Your weakness: Your unpredictable mood swings Your power color: Mauve Your power symbol: Butterfly Your power month: February |
Sunday, July 27, 2008
just thought of writing something...
anything.
been quite stressed these days,
basically caused by our thesis.
and to think that we just got started.
but, life has been going well,
i think.
i'm progressing, bit by bit.
though i still need to learn more,
much more.
been quite stressed these days,
basically caused by our thesis.
and to think that we just got started.
but, life has been going well,
i think.
i'm progressing, bit by bit.
though i still need to learn more,
much more.
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
Ice
After the longest time,
the maiden's shoulders shook.
With it the cold winds blew,
and crystals slipped from her eyes.
An undefined light surrounded her being,
one of eerie gloom it exudes.
She couldn't hide her pain any longer,
she had a cold heart as it was.
Yet, even ice melts...
the maiden's shoulders shook.
With it the cold winds blew,
and crystals slipped from her eyes.
An undefined light surrounded her being,
one of eerie gloom it exudes.
She couldn't hide her pain any longer,
she had a cold heart as it was.
Yet, even ice melts...
Rants...
She always sees my flaws,
she only sees my flaws.
And to think that I had hoped,
when I already knew the ending.
she only sees my flaws.
And to think that I had hoped,
when I already knew the ending.
Friday, June 06, 2008
Dreamy Idealist..hmmm?
-Seems to be quite true for the most part. Click the button to read what it says, and see if you agree with me. You can also take the test yourself! ~.~
Monday, May 26, 2008
Random Thoughts while on the Road
Number One: What's with truck drivers, istambays on the sidewalk, security guard posts...?
- They keep bugging you with their speeches of "Hey, Miss!; Ganda, kumusta?; Good Morning Beautiful?" and all the other nonsense talk just to get your attention. I'm no fool and I'm no beauty as well. It just gets so annoying sometimes not to add a bit creepy! Hay, maybe they are just plain bored with their life. I wish that they get to think of another past time and quick.
Number Two: What if before you say "Yes" or an "I Do" to the love of your life, you reveal all the nasty things about yourself, all the skeleton in your closet, will he still stay and accept you?
- One of my wild imaginations got me thinking this. Pretty weird I know but it's like a test you know so that he/she does not go off running from you when the going gets tough or when things may not seem to be as perfect. It's also a nice plot to a novel. The title may be "100 Things You Didn't Know About Me"; "Love Me or Hate Me?"; "The Truth About Eve/Adam." Hehehe...
Number Three: Poetry, my love for poetry, where did it go?
- I though about getting back to my writing poems again, but it seems that the spirit of creativity has left me completely. I just don't seem to put two and two together, it's like it's all wrong. I hope one day I get struck by the lightning of creativity and be able to write again. I miss the feeling of being able to let out your feelings in a string of beautiful words. I'm not saying my works before were any good but at least I was able to proudly say that I've written quite a few pieces even if it's for my personal purposes alone. I summon you, common strike me now! Hehe.
*I'm pretty bold now to be able to write things like this. I don't know. It's like I'm just full inside and letting out some of my random thoughts would help lighten my load a bit. Stay with me, even if I'm a little wacko. Haha. ~.~
- They keep bugging you with their speeches of "Hey, Miss!; Ganda, kumusta?; Good Morning Beautiful?" and all the other nonsense talk just to get your attention. I'm no fool and I'm no beauty as well. It just gets so annoying sometimes not to add a bit creepy! Hay, maybe they are just plain bored with their life. I wish that they get to think of another past time and quick.
Number Two: What if before you say "Yes" or an "I Do" to the love of your life, you reveal all the nasty things about yourself, all the skeleton in your closet, will he still stay and accept you?
- One of my wild imaginations got me thinking this. Pretty weird I know but it's like a test you know so that he/she does not go off running from you when the going gets tough or when things may not seem to be as perfect. It's also a nice plot to a novel. The title may be "100 Things You Didn't Know About Me"; "Love Me or Hate Me?"; "The Truth About Eve/Adam." Hehehe...
Number Three: Poetry, my love for poetry, where did it go?
- I though about getting back to my writing poems again, but it seems that the spirit of creativity has left me completely. I just don't seem to put two and two together, it's like it's all wrong. I hope one day I get struck by the lightning of creativity and be able to write again. I miss the feeling of being able to let out your feelings in a string of beautiful words. I'm not saying my works before were any good but at least I was able to proudly say that I've written quite a few pieces even if it's for my personal purposes alone. I summon you, common strike me now! Hehe.
*I'm pretty bold now to be able to write things like this. I don't know. It's like I'm just full inside and letting out some of my random thoughts would help lighten my load a bit. Stay with me, even if I'm a little wacko. Haha. ~.~
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