Since valentines is fast approaching, I can't help but wonder and reflect on the state of my heart...
Right now, my heart is excited, nervous, confused, content and hoping.
What's the cause of all these?
I'm excited at the thought of extending my service for God, of stepping up a level higher, of loving more people, of growing more and being closer to Him. At the same time, I'm afraid and nervous... I don't know what to expect. What will the morrow bring? It's all uncertain and I know that all I need to do is to trust God. He won't let me down but I'm only human and I know that God understands why I may be feeling scared. It's enough that despite of this fear I may be feeling, I'll still go on and fight. Courage is not the absence of fear. It's facing the fear and saying I'm gonna do it anyway. Confused because it seems that what I've decided upon is the right thing, it's what God wants, it's what I want and yet the people I love and care for, the people I don't wanna hurt the most are the ones telling me to not go on. They are the ones who are against it. What do I choose? How do I decide? I'm confused. It's hard. I don't know what to do. I'm contented. As I was walking with my mom and grandma this morning, with grocery bags on my hands, I can't help but smile. I realized right then and there that I was blessed. I'm happy and I have this feeling of peace within me despite the chaos that surrounds me. Lastly, my heart is hoping. Hoping to be able to decide what God really wants for me. Hoping that I'll find the light to discern what to do. Hoping that I'll have someone to love in the future who will love me in return. Hoping to make the people around me happy. Hoping that I'll be able to finally forgive myself. Hoping that as I sleep later tonight I'll again feel God's embrace, hugging me tight.:)
Sunday, February 11, 2007
Thursday, February 08, 2007
alternative class...
I recently attended a seminar on "Overcoming Stress and Bringing Joy Back Into My Life." As part of the seminar, we were asked to list our" TOP TEN STRESS BUSTERS." Here's mine:
1. Pray. An effective way of calming yourself and getting to know God more. Two weeks ago I was in a really tight situation, I got so depressed that even my friends couldn't talk me through it. I decided to visit the chapel and to just have a moment of silence and meditation. It helped me a lot. I left the chapel feeling far more better and a lot happier. I realized a lot of things about myself and thought of ways to solve the problem I have.
2. Eat. Whether you admit it or not, we enjoy eating 99% of the time. It reduces any uncomfortable feeling, I think. Especially recommended are sweets... the popular chocolates and my beloved ICE CREAM.:) Yumyum!
3. Laugh. Even at a corny joke. It's a way of boosting your energy level and making you a bot morte cheerful. It's fun and is sai to make you look younger and feel younger too.:)
4. Plan ahead and stick to it. In my case, I get rattled when things suddenly seems to be out of my control. It's better for me to have a plan or an overview of things to come. It's readying yourself for what is to come. Sticking to ones plan is really hard but it is so much worth the trouble.
5. Sing and dance? Like nobody is watching just to get you in the mood. Make an effort to get you out of that slum you are in. Singing your favorite tune helps and dancing will make you laugh at yourself.
6. Read. Books... :) I haven't been having much time to read. Reading helps you think and let your imagination fly. It makes you realize a lot of things about yourself, about other people and about life. It's fun and inspiring at the same time.
7. Worship. With eyes closed. Before, I would feel conscious about other people watching me. But now, I no longer care. I sing my heart out for the Lord because He so deserves it.:) Everytime I worship, I close my eyes and feel God's embrace. Ang sarap ng feeling. Parang lahat nagfa-fade. It's only you and your God. After every worship, I feel like a new person. Ang sarap magmahal ni God.:) Worship for me is God's tight embrace. Worship for me is an expression of my love, my thoughs, my sorrows, my happiness, my faith for Him.:)
8. Music. Listening to any song, any type of music releases any emotion. Whether it be negative or positive. It's better if you can sing-along with it. Walang pakielamanan. Hehe.
9. Chat. Kwentuhan to the max with friends... lam niyo na kung sinu kayo. It hepls a lot. It's fun and unforgettable. You don't even care what time it is. Nakakamiss... And also with my sisters... nakakamiss rin. We're all busy but I tell you, moments like this are worth cherishing forever. The endless laughter and the uncontrollable tears. Hay!
10. Reflect and Take time alone. It hepls to do things you feel like doing ones in a while. To just stop and check if you're still doing okei.
This may not be applicable to all. For me, it works talaga! Hehe. So get out of that depressing mood, there are a lot of ways to fight those! You just have to look around and count the blessings you might have overlooked. Smile! God loves you so much! Mwah!:)
1. Pray. An effective way of calming yourself and getting to know God more. Two weeks ago I was in a really tight situation, I got so depressed that even my friends couldn't talk me through it. I decided to visit the chapel and to just have a moment of silence and meditation. It helped me a lot. I left the chapel feeling far more better and a lot happier. I realized a lot of things about myself and thought of ways to solve the problem I have.
2. Eat. Whether you admit it or not, we enjoy eating 99% of the time. It reduces any uncomfortable feeling, I think. Especially recommended are sweets... the popular chocolates and my beloved ICE CREAM.:) Yumyum!
3. Laugh. Even at a corny joke. It's a way of boosting your energy level and making you a bot morte cheerful. It's fun and is sai to make you look younger and feel younger too.:)
4. Plan ahead and stick to it. In my case, I get rattled when things suddenly seems to be out of my control. It's better for me to have a plan or an overview of things to come. It's readying yourself for what is to come. Sticking to ones plan is really hard but it is so much worth the trouble.
5. Sing and dance? Like nobody is watching just to get you in the mood. Make an effort to get you out of that slum you are in. Singing your favorite tune helps and dancing will make you laugh at yourself.
6. Read. Books... :) I haven't been having much time to read. Reading helps you think and let your imagination fly. It makes you realize a lot of things about yourself, about other people and about life. It's fun and inspiring at the same time.
7. Worship. With eyes closed. Before, I would feel conscious about other people watching me. But now, I no longer care. I sing my heart out for the Lord because He so deserves it.:) Everytime I worship, I close my eyes and feel God's embrace. Ang sarap ng feeling. Parang lahat nagfa-fade. It's only you and your God. After every worship, I feel like a new person. Ang sarap magmahal ni God.:) Worship for me is God's tight embrace. Worship for me is an expression of my love, my thoughs, my sorrows, my happiness, my faith for Him.:)
8. Music. Listening to any song, any type of music releases any emotion. Whether it be negative or positive. It's better if you can sing-along with it. Walang pakielamanan. Hehe.
9. Chat. Kwentuhan to the max with friends... lam niyo na kung sinu kayo. It hepls a lot. It's fun and unforgettable. You don't even care what time it is. Nakakamiss... And also with my sisters... nakakamiss rin. We're all busy but I tell you, moments like this are worth cherishing forever. The endless laughter and the uncontrollable tears. Hay!
10. Reflect and Take time alone. It hepls to do things you feel like doing ones in a while. To just stop and check if you're still doing okei.
This may not be applicable to all. For me, it works talaga! Hehe. So get out of that depressing mood, there are a lot of ways to fight those! You just have to look around and count the blessings you might have overlooked. Smile! God loves you so much! Mwah!:)
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