this feeling i have is...

happiness! 

pure and true...

i just hope it lasts...
a little longer...

nothing lasts forever,


and yet i still wish
to clling on to it.

walang pakielaman.

minsan lang to eh!

Jesus is that you?

I saw Him in the little child's face... Suddenly, I felt this feeling inside that something was definitely amidst.
Everyday I encounter little children or elderly persons, all dirty and somehow lost. They come near you and ask for even just a small amount money for them to have something to eat. Each and every time, they never fail to affect me.

To tell you the truth, I often feel uneasy when this happens. I am just not certain on what is the right thing to do, on what action to take. What are the limits? What are the necessary actions? As a child of God, up to what extent should I be willing to offer?

I am actually also guilty at times when I give but not at all willingly, when I think twice before actually putting those few tinkling coins in their hands, when I don't take the opportunity to extend help and give love, when I doubt them, when I avoid them, when I help but somehow expect something in return... Mixed emotions in a single encounter.

One thing is for sure, I saw God in the little child's face. I saw Jesus' reflection in those angelic eyes.
Maybe, I'll still feel the same awkwardness, maybe I'll still react the same way but I know that little by little I am changed; little by little I struggle to be more loving.

At the end of the day, we are all brothers and sisters. We all come from the same Creator, we have all been saved and loved. That I would say is reason enough for us to do something in our own way.

Nothing will happen if we don't do anything. They are indeed God's blessings for they give us the opportunity to be better persons. :)

just felt a connection

once there was a butterfly in my palm
but i let it fly
not because i don't love it
but i want it to enjoy with the flowers and the bees,.,

keeping it in my palm won't make it the best butterfly it can be,.,

so far from a distance, im happier watching it
fly and play
in the garden while the sun is still shining,.,

because when the rain comes,.,

i'll know...
if it truly loves me...
it will fly back to me

~let me fly, let me soar, let me go... i want freedom, and i want it now... i feel your arms tight around me and to tell you honestly, i can't breathe properly... don't be afraid to loosen your grip, don't worry... i love you and i'll come back... as i am, whole and so much better...~

the break is over

reality sweeps in again and takes me away from paradise. not necessarily paradise, but rest pauses in life we have come to appreciate. the second semester of my junior year is
looming in. i don't want to go to school just yet. although there is no reason to delay.
i somehow feel that i am close to suffocating. i have this nervous tick inside my heart, like there is something not quite right. i'm feeling unprepared. once again i'm feeling helpless. i detest having this feeling, and allowing it to dwell in me. need to get back on my feet, the world is spinning and i'm left hanging.