it can be that i'm asking too much.

but can you blame me?

i only wanted the good in life,
if that's too much,
i'm sorry i even asked. =(

Came back from Neverland...=)

Just had my retreat last weekend. It was different out there.

Silence.

A time to think and ponder about God, me and the world.

I came back with renewed energy and a baggage full of hope. =)=)=)

sintunado.

sintunado daw ako. tuwing ako'y umaawit. laging na-o-off key, nauuna o nahuhuli man sa mga nota ng kanta. pag dating naman sayo, bakit ganun, lagi mong sinasambit na nasa tono ako, na may tono ako. ang hirap, balibaliktarin ko man, hindi ko padin masabi ng tama ang mga nasa isipan ko. ang konsert sa utak ko, kahit ilang beses na ang pinagdaanang rehearsals, eh laging mali ang labas. para bang nagiging isang bangunguot ang lahat. lagi ko tuloy hinihiling na sana matapos na ang kanta. sana para sa susunod na set na lang ako babawi. itigil na ang kanta, hindi ko na abot ang nota.

Over na ata! Sobraaaa na!

Pero sorry di pa din papa-awat! Ang sayaaa ko kanina at hanggang ngayon... tingnan mo nga at di pa ko tulog. Haiiii! Abot langit na naman ang smiles ko ngayong gabing puno ng bituin.

Salamats Inday! The best ka talaga! Ikaw na lagi ko isasama! Ahahahaha. Sana may next time pa kahit ayaw mo na..hehe.

Chance Glance

Walking along paved roads
in solitary mode, drowned by
the sudden crowd amidst the
milky air, I scanned every face I
encountered to no avail since
eyes were downcast, keeping to
themselves their untold
secrets, just when I started
giving up, I chanced upon your
hazel eyes, it lingered a second
or two longer-like a heartbeat...
without hestitation, and then I felt that
in the vastness of the universe, my
solitariness broke its routinary
mode, the rhythmic cycle halted
for a second
or two
thanks to you.
-04.14.09 (10:47am)

*kanina habang nagaantay matawag for testing. nag-adik at sumulat ng tula.

A day of rejoicing!

Happy easter everyone!

After attending mass with my mom, everything feels a lot lighter and happier and brighter.

Starting anew with the promise of God safe in my hand. I-am-grateful. =) 

this is insanity!

Back off. Stalker like mode.

Dark shades. Music down low.

Epitome of a new morrow.

Who to care? for another meager's life.

Nosy nose above closed books.

Searching for the needle in the fields of h-a-y.

Back off stranger!

Mind your own beeswax.

Waste some time. 

Be a worry wart of your own busy world.

-04.12.09 (6:30am)

some fairy tales are of bitter endings.

raging shouts echoes in solitary air,

surrounding a heavy heart.

silent cries of helplessness, 

midway into a deserted sanctuary.

wonderment crushed,

as fairytales gets snatched.

pretty princess in despair,

as the clock strikes 12:00.

magical carriage and enchanting appearance,

in a flash warps back to reality. 

*puro nega nalang ang posts ko. pero i feel at home writing about loneliness. weird ko. haha. yan kasi lagi lumalabas tuwing susulat ako. sabi ko pa naman masaya na dapat post ko since puro kadramahan na lang these past few days pero can't help that which flow naturally.   

wish

ang mumunti kong hiling ngayon ay:

-no more tears!

-bente quatro oras ng kapayapaan.

-kahit isang araw lang na walang malungkot at walang nagagalit; walang nakasimangot at walang nasasaktan.

misleading oasis

compulsions escalating to obsessions,

as the id, ego and superego battle it out.

tearing one from the other,

where intellect and will become a messy blur.

where one is left behind,

tear stricken and alone.

deceived by worldly schemes,

and promises of perpetual happiness.

*Holy Week. Maundy Thursday. Reflection on Jesus Christ's sacrifice on the cross. Dying for our sins. Our endless sins and ungrateful nature. His mercy abounds forever. Do not be blinded. What choice do we make?  

paulit-ulit

paumanhin sa mga salang paulit-ulit.

ilang beses man magsabing di na uulit.

pilit pa ring bumabalik. 

pasensya ka na. alam kong mali.

pero sana tulungan mo kong untugin ang matigas kong ulo.

ng paulit-ulit. para nang tuluyang matuto.

flickering lights

on and off.

yes and no.

here and there.

this and that.

now and then.

could and would.

you and me.

magnetic pull on opposite ends

wanting to be noticed yet feigning to be invisible.

trodding less travelled paths yet dreading the unexpected.

striving to be normal yet struggling to be different.

some things never change..

and so the same cycle repeats itself...

bad habits left unchanged.

nasty attitudes dismissed.

new discoveries blinded.

and memories starts turning gray...

Mind in shambles.

Put my mind at ease,

Carry me to your disease.

Hold me tight at the very least,

Feel my heart become at peace.

*Walang magawa...basta may rhyme. haha. =p